Thursday, February 28, 2008

Mediocrity is the new black

I had an awesome day yesterday. Got a lot of stuff done, which is always rewarding for me. Even though Kenzee wouldn't take a nap, I wouldn't let it bother me. Got to go send off a friend who is having her baby in Utah, and heading out this weekend for there. I won't see her again until after baby comes. We had fun chatting. I came home excited for things to come.


And then I came home. I ran online to check on something I had been anxiously waiting on for about 5 days now. As the screen popped up, I saw that my wait was over. But, then I was really nervous and didn't want to look. So, I said a silent prayer, hoping for the best, and scrolled down the screen. I wish I wouldn't have looked. I wasn't so happy anymore. I was angry at first. I ranted and raved to the hubby about it, and though he tried to make me feel better, I wasn't wanting to be told it was going to be ok. I wanted to be angry. I was going to tell this lady off and let her know how wrong she was. Ok, so I wasn't...but I thought about it for a long time. And then I started thinking of how I could convince her about how wrong she was. Yeah...can't do that either. There's nothing I can really do without making things worse. I hate that. I don't like feeling defeated. But that's how I feel right now. DEFEATED. Thankfully, I'm a bit of a fighter, so I'm not backing down. But I lost that round. And it really just.....sucks. {that's a naughty word in my house}
So, I'm in a bad mood today. I can't help it. I'm not angry anymore, just really sad. I hate that you can work so hard for something, and mediocrity is all that is wanted. Going above and beyond is frowned upon apparently. I feel like I've been deflated. Do I cut myself short and be mediocre? I don't know...
Thankfully, I went over to my friend, Katie's, blog and she had some really awesome quotes posted today. Thanks so much! It helped me to remember a few things. I'm still not a happy girl, but it made me stop and think.
"Life is like riding a bike, in order to maintain your balance you must continue to move forward."
I'll get over this....eventually....but I don't know where to go from here. If mediocrity is ok, and creativity is not; but I'm a creative person, and hate mediocrity...what to do? Be bland, I guess. That's what I've resigned myself to. Bland is just so much harder for me.

9 comments:

Amber M. said...

Mediocrity is for wimps! Keep those creative juices flowing, baby! Hope you feel better soon. eat some chocolate for me, too. that always seems to help.

Sister Honey Bunch/Judi maloney said...

Princess, turn your back on the mediocrity. Don't let discouragement get in the way of living up to your full potential.

You were created to be fulfilled, and mediocrity won't get you there.

I was in a Bible study and we talked about how when we are striving to move forward toward a goal that is good and pure and we know it is right, and there are obstacles placed in our way again and again...that's how we know we are on the right path. Otherwise, who would try to stop us? You know what I mean?

Here's the quote: "Satan will never oppose us more than when he thinks we're onto our callings. Bet on that. As L.B. Cowman said in Streams in the Desert, "Both in the physical realm and spiritual realm, great pressure means great power." (p.9)"

Bonnie B. said...

Jeez, girlie! Sounds like a bad day!! Just be who you are. If someone doesn't like it, too darn bad! We, your faithful blog buddies, will always have your back. You rock! And like Amber said, chocolate never hurts!

Holly said...

Sorry for the bad day. I hope it gets better. Spring is coming, that makes me happy:)

Anonymous said...

bad days do suck. sorry you're having one of those! don't be bland for other people's sake...be you. anything less and you'll just be mad at yourself--and that's never a good thing! hope things get better! :)

OHmommy said...

"Life is like riding a bike, in order to maintain your balance you must continue to move forward."


i LOVE that quote!

Sister Sassy said...

Honey girl, let it roll off you. Tomorrow is another day and as disappointing as it is to get back an answer you didn't want there is always another day to work toward a different answer or a better answer.

Every door leads somewhere, every closed one opens a window. I believe firmly we end up where we belong. Have faith in the journey and learning ...whatever it may be. I hope you feel less sad and remember that lady whoever she is-is just that-a lady.

Of course I'm making assumptions about what you may be talking about, so I could be totally off!

kelly said...

as annie says:
the sun will come out tomorrow.

just shake it off, because tomorrow is a new day!

rotten days suck! but, i guess if we didn't have them, we wouldn't know how good the good ones truly are.

Bridget said...

Oh, that sounds like a very not good day. The good thing about bad days is you can say fairly confidently that tomorrow will bed better.