You Live, You Learn

Remember that song by Alanis Morisette? Just asking...

I have been learning all sorts of fabulous things from my two year old lately. I had no idea she was so insanely smart. I bet your toddlers are just as smart. In case they are 'slow' I'll share in the wisdom of my wee one....

1. If you want something....scream. whine. throw yourself on the floor if you have to. It may take several hours of this, but in the end your dad will give you whatever you want. It doesn't work with the momma. So, only use these tactics with the father figure. Sure, mom will be angry, but you get what you want. And that's all that matters right?

2. Dora is cute. Her songs are catchy. Learn them and sing them at the top of your lungs. Your parents will think you are cute too....like Dora.

3. If you want to sleep with your parents wait until 3:00 in the morning to crawl into bed with them. They will be to tired to do anything about it.

4. Dresses should be worn every day. It doesn't matter if everyone ends up seeing your panties. What's modesty? I haven't learned that word yet. And getting dirty? It's all part of the fun.

5. Markers are better than crayons. Especially for books, walls, and doors.

6. Doritos are a food group.

7. Whatever your brother can do....you can do it too.

8. Baths should be taken several times a day. If you get yourself dirty, your mom will make you take one. So get dirty a lot.

9. Learn phrases such as, "But, mommy....I want you." and "Mommy.......wuuuuuvvvv youuuuu." Use them frequently. They are heart melters.

10. Pretend you can't hear or don't understand. Your parents might let you get away with it. If they've caught you pretending...give them a sassy smile and do it anyway.

But I'm sure your toddlers knew all of this stuff too......