Saturday, March 1, 2008

Why am I doing this?

In reflection of the sour week I had last week, and the frustration I am still feeling now, I remembered something someone told me a few weeks ago.

He said, "I need you to write down what I need to tell you to stay motivated. Or, in other words, why am I doing this? That way I can use your words against you because the way I see it, there are two kinds of people in this world. Those who want to quit, and quitters."

This popped into my head this morning and it made me stop for a minute. This applies to so many things. Why are we doing this? Why is it important? Sometimes we need a reminder. I often think about the selflessness of mothers. We give up our bodies by birthing them, social calendars, and sometimes our sanity in order to provide a good life for our children. We love them. But there are days that the laundry seems never ending, there are dirty dishes AGAIN!, the baby has another stinky diaper, there are Doritos crushed into the carpet and bananas squished into the couch, and though it's dinnertime, you haven't even made it into the shower yet because you were finishing up your kids school project that is due tomorrow. Those are the days I want to throw my hands up in the air and lock myself in my room yelling "I QUIT!" We start to ask ourselves, "Why did I want to do this again?"

Sometimes we need a reminder. Though I prefer the natural reminders like my daughter giving me a big hug and kiss while saying, "Wuv woo mommy!" Maybe on one of our "good days" we should sit down and write down what we need to tell ourselves to stay motivated. Or, in other words, why we are doing this. Here's my list:

  • I do this to help my kids now that I am always here for them. That I am here for them now when they are still small, will hopefully be ingrained in their minds when they need help in the future.

  • I learn more from my kids some days than what I actually teach them. Though I know that the calling of being a mother is a magnificent one, there are days where I feel more blessed by having them as my children than they are for having me as their mother.

  • I am doing this to help provide as safe and comfy place for my children. I want them to WANT to be home. To feel comfortable bringing their friends over for YEARS to come.

  • Though the saying is, "A clean home is a happy home" cleaning is not my idea of fun. But I'm setting a good example for my kids. My son will NOT be one of those guys that doesn't know how to cook anything except for Ramen Noodles. And he will know how to do his own laundry.

  • More importantly, I do this for the kisses, the hugs, the giggles, the tea parties, the secret clubhouses, the tickle monsters, the snuggles, and piggyback rides. To make sure they KNOW they are loved beyond description.

Maybe I'm the only one that has days like this. But this idea can apply to just about anything we are trying to accomplish. As I have been reminded, sometimes the hardest journeys are the ones with the biggest rewards. What's my reward for countless loads of laundry, daily dish washing, nose wiping, and diaper changing? The adoration of two adorable kids that I have the honor of mothering. And it IS an honor.

So, go write your list so you can use it against yourself on your next "bad" day. I plan on using mine.

BTW....check this out! I love comments just as much {or probably more} than the next person. The more the better. It makes this blogging even more fun! So, hop on over here and check out this great idea!


Bonnie B. said...

You are awesome, you know that? Thanks for the "uplift"!

Sister Sassy said...

"Doritos crushed into the carpet and bananas squished into the couch"

omg! Did you come to my house??

I just found 1/4 of Sawyer's eaten banana in a Dora Explorer tea cup in my Kindred's bed. LOL!

Today has been a LONG mommy day...I keep telling them sorry I'm crabby-then I have to explain what Crabby means and on and on.

Glad you're blog hopping :)

Anonymous said...

This is a great post. You're so right that some days it's a lot harder to remember the good and easier to question why we do what we do. It's so important not to forget.

btw - I like playing Black Sabbath on Guitar Hero. :)

and how are you liking the Follett book? I read that one years ago, but i just finished the "sequel" to it a week or so back. I posted about it.

blog hop hop hopping.

Anonymous said...

You are so NOT the only mommy to feel this way...I felt like this from about 9:30 on this morning. But the "You're the best mommy in the whole wide whole world" that I got when tucking in my daughter tonight made it all worth it. Almost.

Bloghopping on by~~Winomama

Sister Honey Bunch said...

Ashlee, I have to say this is the best post I have read in awhile. And now you're actually making me think and giving me homework. Just like a good BBFF should.

Jen said...

This is such a great idea, Ashlee! A list like yours would be an excellent tool for getting through those moments that feel simply overwhelming...

Buxton Family said...

Funny you should write about this because I had a similar conversation with Wade last night on our walk.

BusyDad said...

Ok, I can't let you pimp the blog hop without adding you to the Blog Hoppers page! I will add you right now. Thanks! I'm glad you like the idea.

Cameron said...

Keep your chin up.